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THE MATT GROENING 9/11 TRIBUTE AUCTION - MY STORY
 My
name is James Harvey. I am an art collector and wine enthusiast, and I
live in the city of Newport with my two sons, Tom (25) and Scott (4).
I am still reeling from my messy divorce, which I prefer not to talk about.
Late last year, I recieved the above item from a friend at an annual
collector's get-together. I posted the cartoon for auction on eBay
on Saturday, 17th of January 2003, expecting at least to make a small
sum of money and to honour what I believed to be a worthy tribute to America's
most noble tragedy. When I put it up, I was not aware that the item I
was selling was in any way fraudulent.
Nethertheless, soon after I put the auction online I started to recieve
many angry and abusive email messages. I'm going to show you a selection
of them now, just to give you an idea of the general lack of manners present
on eBay. These are the original messages as I recieved them and have not
been altered. As I believe is customary on the internet, I have illustrated
them with random pictures of other people, mainly from www.uglypeople.com.
I don't why you have to do this, I think it must be the law or something.
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 >'discogod69'
wrote:
Hello,
How can you exploit the worst tragedy of our generation to try and
make a quick buck?
Not only that, but the picture is an obvious fraud. Apart from the
numerous spelling errors (including 'The Simpsons' - I'm sure "The
Groenster" (as absolutely no one calls him) knows how to spell
the name of his own creations) it looks nothing like Matt Groening's
style!
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU? ARE YOU RETARDED, OR JUST INCREDIBLY
STUPID?!?
Thanks, Matthew Beahan
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|  >'jesse'
wrote:
u said he drew
this on 9/11/01, right (with tears a pourin)
well why does the date on the pic say 9/11/02(yeah 2002)guess the
shock he was experiencing jumped him into the future-rama!!!!, i
think u found this at McDonalds (yeah u stole it from some kid,
nice!) U R O.K. USA, right now i am e-mailing all your bidders and
telling them the truth, u will be exposed for the fraud you are!!!!
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|  >'gitd_buckley'
wrote:
WHAT
A FUCKING SACAM - YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED.
YOU EVEN GOT THE DATE WRONG,
EVEN THOUGH MANY PEOPLE HAVE HAD TO TELL YOU D0NT YOU FELL SHAME/SORROW
FOR THE HEARBREACK THE FAMALIES HAVE SUFFERED AROUND THE WORLD?
HAVRE YOU A CERTIFICATE
OF AUTHENTICITY?
YOU QUOTE, 'FOR THE PURPOSE
OF SELLING ON EBAY', IS THIS A FUCKING RIPP-OFF OR WOT?
I HOPE YOU SUFFER LIKE
MANY OTHERS HAVE FOLLOWING THE TRAGIC EVENT IN QUESTION!
I bet i dont even get a
reply to follow my suggestions - '0' feedback - you ought to be
banned! WHY
EBAY PUT UP WITH TWATS LIKE YOU IS AN UTTER DISGRACE! |
'There's always a few who want to spoil it for others', I thought to
myself, fully expecting a deluge of positive emails to follow once the
real Simpsons collectors heard about my auction. But then, 'gitd_buckley'
sent me a follow-up to his original message:
After telling Mr. Buckley that his accusations of cheating/theivery were
tantamount to mental burglary, I checked out his link. I was shocked at
what I saw.
Could it be that the item I was selling was not an original
Groening?
According the the denizens of the 'Simpsons Collector Sector', it could
not be an original indeed.
Fans of the Simpsons are known for their intelligence and sense of humour.They
are also famous for their ability to understand and appreciate jokes.
And from this day on, I hope they become famous for their ability to GRATUITOUSLY
OFFEND:
|  >'bill47'
wrote:
Do you know
you are selling a FAKE!!!??? If you do, which is more than likley
becasue you probably drew it yourself, then take this off straight
away. Firstly the is spelt wrong(I think Matt knows how to spell
the). Second Matt wouldn't make fun of Sept 11th. Third It's dated
a year after it happened. Forth the cartoons are nothing like
Matt would draw them (not even like the originals Finaly Matts
signature is compleatly wrong.
If you sell
this I will report you to Fox. THIS IS NOT A JOKE |
My reply to him came swiftly yet tearfully.
|  I'd
like to pick you up on one thing- at no point does anybody 'make
fun of' september the 11th. I believe the cartoon to be a heartfelt
expression of sorrow by a man brought low by raw, raw human emotion.
You have offended me. I hope you suffer like all the people who
suffered on september the 11th. I promised myself I wouldn't cry
at this, but there I go. I'm crying. I hope you're proud of yourself,
you MONSTER.
Yours sincerely,
James Harvey
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The hit counter was beginning to roll up fast, partly due to my canvassing
The Simpsons message boards under assumed names and partly due to my emailing
the cartoon historian Jerry Beck
and saying 'DUDE U GOTTA PUT THIS AUCTION ON UR SITE ITS FRICKIN HILARIOUS!!!'
...As I'm a middle-aged art collector who was sincerely trying to sell
the cartoon and all, I'm not quite sure why I was doing that. Anyway,
I just want to go back to the 'Simpsons Collector Sector' for a second,
so I can show you this guy:
Dipshit.
Anyhoo, as the hate mails continued to fill up my inbox, I decided that
I would respond to each and every one of them in turn, with honest and
truthful answers to their queries.
|  >'jgittes88'
wrote:
Why are you selling
such a phoney item? Your discription tells me instantly that the
entire thing is a fake, and you didn't know that the towers collapsed
in 2001? Are you that stupid? |
Dear
sir,
I, like many
people in the United Kingdom, thought that the two towers collapsed
in 2002. We have a lot of trouble distinguishing one piece of American
ephemera with another, and I was simply confusing the tragedy with
your movie, 'The Two Towers', which DID come out in 2002.
I am not stupid,
in fact I have a very large, veiny forehead, struggling to contain
the vast quantity of brain matter inside. So perhaps YOU are the
stupid one. ROTFLMFAO!! (that's internet slang for Running On The
Field Laughing My Face Apart Okay??)
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|  'simian_ebay'
wrote:
you have got
to be kidding me... have you any idea about the simpsons? please
tell me this is a joke and a very sick, badly sketched one at that...
look at your item again and take into account that a four year old
somewhere has duped you. |
As
far as I can tell, the item is genuine. I have
no reason to suspect otherwise- what makes you think it's not by
'The Groenster'? The characters are all saying their trademark catchphrases-
they don't look quite like they do in the show, but that's because
the show isn't drawn by Matt.
He just writes
it.
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|  'martynlucas'
wrote:
Would it not
be more believable if the guy who 'IS' the Simpsons, Matt Groening,
could actually spell 'The Simpsons'!!! You missed the second s off.
The Simpons,
hahahahaha |
I
have spoken with my associates, and we decided that with the word
'Simpons' Groening was making a pun on the word 'Tampons',suggesting
that The Simpsons are the ones who will have to mop up the blood
caused by the 9/11 tragedy.
The cartoon works
on so many levels, doesn't it? A deeply moving and yet brutally
funny work. |
| >'revolutionxtheonlysolution'
 wrote:
omfg
you are retarded
kill yourself
|
That
is the most profound thing I have ever heard in my entire life. There
was more truth in that single haiku-like sentence than there was in
the entire works of any authors you care to mention combined. I'm
going to quit art dealing now and kill myself as you suggested, because
now I've been exposed to the pure holy light that was your email my
face has melted off. |
|  >'whiskey'
wrote:
I surely hope
other people have contacted ebay of this obvious fraud. Nonetheless,
I'm doing it also.
Why?
I'm sure "Matt"
knows how to spell "Simpsons."
I'm sure "Matt" knew what year it was.
I'm sure "Matt" draws better than what was depicted -
it looked like someone drew that with a pencil sticking out of his
butt.You should be ashamed.
|
I
am truly shocked, sir. I had no idea that this item was a fraud, and
yet as many as 3 people have contacted me to tell me it is. Can you
please write me a list of everything that is wrong with the picture,
and then shove it up your flue? |
On about the third day, we were delighted for our auction to be made into
be made an honorary 'Awful Link Of the Day' on the American humor
website Something Awful. This helped
us to get a shitload more hits, and this email:
 >Dear
Sir or Madam,
I have just seen
your auction, and I must say I am very interested in this item!
I, and my friend,
regularly acknowledge that I am probably the biggest Simpons fan
in the world, and I try to collect as many items as possible that
have been created by Mr. Groening. This piece is exquiste, and definately
one of a kind! His whimsical, child-like drawing style in this piece
very much reminds me of the earliest episodes of the T.V. show.
If only I had the proper monies on hand I would definately outbid
the current owner and then, trust me, there would be many many more
smudges on teh paper! The tears of joy that would flow from owning
this piece would surely race down my cheek neck and neck with tears
of sorrow!
This is my dream!
Sincerely,
Wishing I was rich.
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Meanwhile, back on the Simpsons Collector Sector, the guy who sent me
that first email was starting to get rather confused.
Something else on that board caught
my eye:
Check that out. You can be an Ebay user for 10 years, get 10,000 positive
feedback and no negatives and make an honest living too, but you'll still
never top that comment I got in my first week. 'You're a good seller,
Chuck, you're good. But I'm the seller who should be RUNNING HELL.'
Meanwhile, the hateful emails were beginning to take on a threatening
tone. As before, I continued to respond to them as best I could.
|  >'devarona'
wrote:
I work for Fox
television. If this does not come down within the hour, you can
expect a lawsuit that will leave you bankrupt. |
I
was wondering when this situation would rear its ugly head. So, Fox
doesn't want people to see the sensitive side of Matt Groening, preferring
instead that we all believe in the legend of 'Iron Matt'? Well, listen
to me- I don't care if Rupert Murdoch is God and his laywers are the
7 candles of the caballah. THE PEOPLE MUST KNOW THE TRUTH.
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|  >'fmctp39'
wrote:
I just e-mailed
Matt and let him know you're selling a fraudulent piece of artwork.
I wouldn't be surprised at all if our lawyers aren't drawing up
charges as I write this.
Enjoy your day
of freedom, my friend. It will probably be one of your last. |
 I'm
well aware that you emailed Matt Groening, because I AM HE under a
clever psuedonym (fake name)! You're the first person I've told 'bout
this, but my new show is going to be about selling fake things on
eBay, and then laughing at the retards who ask me questions! Keep
this under your hat buddy, 'cause ya don't wanna blow the lid on your
Uncle Matt's next project! 'NUFF SAID!
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That's how I imagine Matt Groening actually talks.
On the morning of the 24th of January, the auction was shut down by Ebay,
having had over 23,000 hits and reaching bids of up to £10,000,000,
mostly from a 14-year-old Simpsons enthusiast named 'thisisobviouslyfake@hotmail.com', and one from the accomplished jazz drummer Louis Barfe.
Ebay did not give me ANY prior warning that they were going to do remove my auction- needless
to say, I was not surprised by their ungentlemanly actions (I would
expect nothing less from an internet site run by an American). But by that time, I had received over 150 emails on the subject
of my eBay auction and spent literally hours responding to each of them
individually, mostly while people watched over my shoulder and giggled.
I'm now going to leave you with one of the last emails I received
before the auction ended:
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 'myarmismissin'
wrote:
It has come to
my attention that this is not an original Simpsons art by Groening.
Iam one of many animators at Yancone studio's where the many Simpsons
episodes are created. Matt ocasionally come by. I ask him about
this and he had no idea what the hell i was talking about. He thought
it was funny... but at the same time illegal.
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Thanks for reading,
James Harvey (Ms.)
P.S. A few weeks later, I also put a collection of Star Wars Episode
III storyboards and concept art on eBay. As I had anticipated it didn't
blow up anything like as big as the 9/11 one, which was a shame because
I think more people needed to see this image.
CLICK
HERE TO GO BACK TO THE MAIN PAGE!
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